I have to go shopping for a wedding shower gift today. We are going to our first co-ed wedding shower next week. It is for the son and fiancé of my dearest friend in life. I don’t remember when I haven’t known her. I think we have been in each other’s lives since I was about 3, and she 4. She lived up the street from us at the shore. She and her family were one of the few year-round residents on our block.

We have been separated by distance and circumstances over the 40-some years we have known one another, but we have never been separated by spirit. It was quite evident early on that Kate and I are soulmates….we are alike in so many ways. We have shared all the important stuff, like getting boobs and bras, first periods, make-up, trying cigarettes, BOYS. We were masters at strolling the boardwalk looking for guys and always upping our ages by at least one year when we talked to them!

Kate’s family was so different from mine. I loved going to her house and was there as much as possible. Her brothers still make fun of me for sticking my nose on the screen door…”Can Kathy come out?” She is the third of six children, a large Irish Catholic family with very strict parents. Her parents would probably be accused of abuse in this day and age, but then it was considered keeping the kids in line.

Her mother was particularly intimidating…..still is, but as I have gotten older it doesn’t bother me like it did when I was younger. Her father, though strict, could also have so much fun! Her mother worked nights as a waitress, so we often had time with just her father. He would take us to the beach in the evening, pile his 6 kids and me in the car and take us to the drive-in theatre, play games with us….he was wicked at card games, he would do ‘irresponsible’ (but fun) things …I remember him setting off cherry bombs in a trash can under concrete steps ( my ears are still reverberating from that!), and even get down on the floor and wrestle with us. I broke my arm playing ‘horsey’ with him and just to prove we were soulmates, Kate broke her arm as my cast was about to come off!

Kate’s father just celebrated his 76th birthday. He now lives with Kate as he suffers from Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s disease. It is heartbreaking to see the man he is today….a once vibrant, full of laughs man scared to take a shower because he doesn’t remember how it works. I can tell he just hates what these diseases have done to him, but he and the doctors are powerless against them. It saddens me to see that Kate’s life virtually revolves around the care of her father, but I know she is doing it out of love.

Kate’s family was the big, albeit dysfunctional, family I never had and my family was a slice of normalcy for Kate. She loved being with my family….my mother in her shirtwaist dresses, jewelry and make-up and my father in his suits and wing-tipped shoes…..like they had stepped out of the TV. My mother would bake my father’s favorite desserts and get dressed up on Friday evenings awaiting my father's arrival for the weekend. (He stayed at our other house during to week to be closer to work) We both found in each other’s families what lacked in our own. She needed calm from my family and I craved the action of 6 kids in a small house and the ‘edge’ of strict parents from her family.

As of last month, Kate’s parents no longer live up the street from us at the shore. Her parents were no longer able to live there on their own as neither can drive. I will miss that tie to my childhood and the wonderful memories I share with Kate and her family. I know that it will not be the end of my relationship with them. Our pasts are too intertwined to be forgotten or severed. For that reason I very much look forward to occasions such as the wedding shower at Kate’s next week. I love being with Kate, we fall into synch immediately. I love being with her parents, brothers and sisters who have always made me feel as if I am a part of their never-dull family.

I know that many people are not as fortunate as I to have such a terrific life-long friend as Kate. We are, of course, no longer part of each other’s daily life……but it doesn’t seem to matter. When we are together we still finish one another’s sentences and laugh and cry in the same breath as we did when we were kids. I sometimes think she knows what I am thinking before I do! I am very blessed to have Kate in my life!!

A boring day in the life of a boring homemaker. I did take Newt to the vet today. I was surprised he weighs 2.6 pounds....I didn't think he even weighed 1 pound! He got his first round of shots. I asked when he can be neutered (never had a male cat before) and declawed.....yeah, we're cruel people who 'cut off cat's fingertips'.......he can be neutered at 6 months and can be declawed in two weeks!? I know he has an unfair advantage over the girl cats since they have no claws, but I don't know about putting him under at 8 weeks. But I do trust our vet.

I am missing Marna....she is sleeping over at her friend Danielle's house.....4 houses down. Danielle's grandpop is going to take them to a marionette show at the community college tomorrow morning. She will have a blast....she always does when she sleeps over with friends.

Stole the idea for taking this test from Jim's Blog. Thank you Jim! It's a Personality Test. I have to say it's pretty right on for me.

Like just 6% of the population you are a MENTOR (SEAT). Some would call you the most powerful and influential of all people. Those people are wrong.

The reality is that you DON'T really WANT to impose personal views or beliefs on others. Yet you are extroverted and intelligent, and you like to get involved. So you help others with the pursuit of knowledge.

You're the reason that people say "teachers are also students." You are as much a learner as a master, and this satisfies you.

You won't die a lonely death, but towards the end you'll grow introspective, wondering if your life meant anything. This will last for decades, and you'll die after your spouse.

The furniture store just called. Our new bedroom furniture is in. Mike is still not finished with the bedroom.....it's tough when you work every day and two nights a week, as well. We really don't want the furniture until Mike is finished. I explained that to them and they are nice enough to keep the furniture until we are ready. Mike says he will probably finish this weekend. The lady must think we are crazy. We ordered the furniture about 8 weeks ago and we are just now redoing the bedroom???? LOL

In keeping with the title of this blog.....I am going to bore you. Maybe it's the fact that my kids are no longer babies and there is NO WAY there are going to be more human babies living in this house.......perhaps that is why I have been enthralled watching Newt for the last 48 hours. Rooney and Casper were this tiny when we got them, but that was 20 years ago. I barely remember them being kittens. Duffy and Triggs were much older kittens when we got them, so I am having so much fun watching teeny tiny Newt discover his world (this house).

He has no fear whatsoever, no fear of the big girl sister cats.....they are much more afraid of him! He gets right in their faces and takes their swats with ease. He climbs all the furniture and surprised us by climbing up the basement stairs the first night. Duffy and Triggs didn't venture up the stairs for 4 days and they were 3 times his size. I am loving how Brody and Marna are delighting in Newt, too.....he is just so small, one can't help but immediately fall in love with him. This old lady is very happy to have a baby in the house.......even if it is a furry, four-legged baby.

We actually got in the orthodontist's today. He filed Marna's retainer to adjust for where she has lost some more teeth. We won't see purple glitter when she smiles any longer. He also said that her teeth are coming in so crooked that he wants to put brackets on her front upper teeth. This will amount to a first round of braces and when she hits puberty she will be getting a second round to 'finalize' her mouth. Her teeth look horrible.....so many missing and the ones that are in or are coming in are so terribly crooked.....I don't even want to think what her mouth would look like had we not gone to the orthodontist!! Marna is such a trooper through all of this. No adult could put up with all she has been through in the world of dentistry and orthodontics.

I am so sick of dealing with idiots!!!! We made an appointment at the orthodontist several weeks ago for Marna on 4/24/01 at 9:00. Marna and I arrive shortly before 9 and the place is dark and locked up tighter than a drum. We wait for 15 minutes....knowing full well they aren't going to open....they are always open early. I take Marna back to school and explain to her principal that we don't have a note, but show her the appointment card to prove I am not a loony!

I come home and call. "Oh they aren't going to be in Bridgeton until tomorrow." I explain to her my appointment card says the 24th......."Oh, I'm sorry, that's a wrong. We have her in the computer for tomorrow, the 25th." I will be taking that appointment card and shoving it under the bimbo receptionist's nose tomorrow!!!

The guy we got our kittens Duffy and Triggs from told Mike that mother cat's newest litter was able to leave the nest. They are 8 weeks old. We have been going back and forth about getting a third cat since we heard mother cat had another litter. Duffy and Triggs have turned out to be such lovable kittens. I loved Casper and Rooney with all my heart, but I have to say that Duffy and Triggs are much sweeter cats.

I am such a worrier.....I don't want to upset the balance between Duffy and Triggs.....but I wanted another kitten. What to do???? Mike gave me many illustrations of friends who have added cats with no problem....I still wasn't convinced. The kids started begging.....on their knees.....I caved. We went out to the farm....I knew as soon as I saw them I wouldn't be able to resist. I couldn't. We went out with the idea of taking the black striped kitten, but then I saw this blue-gray and white one. He is so handsome, I couldn't resist. So he came home with us today. We named him Newt and he is currently living in the basement. There is a couch and chair down there and he has already mastered climbing onto those. He can't quite make the steps yet, but I am sure it won't take him long to figure them out.

Duffy and Triggs don't know quite what to think about this new invader. There has been a bit of hissing and some licking...but luckily no roughness. They seem to sense he is a baby. I am worried about them getting along, but Mike, the kids and a few friends I have called have assured me they will get along after an adjustment period. I hope so.....

I am so pissed! Our DSL was down from 3 PM yesterday and wasn't working until I woke up this morning!!! This is the second day this week! Is there no provider that's reliable??????

Bad day at Black Rock here.....no one is old enough to know what that is, I bet.....it is an old Spencer Tracy (anyone old enough to remember him???) film. My family has used the title of that movie for whenever things don't go the way we plan. My family has a saying for just about everything. If you are in the bathroom and there is no toilet paper left under the sink, you have to yell "Joe McGucken!!!" Anyone in the house (even many of our friends now know this) knows this means toilet paper is needed immediately. It comes from friends' of my grandparents. Mrs. McGucken was visiting my grandparents and was in the bathroom with no toilet paper, so she started screaming for her husband. This probably happened in the 1920's and my family still screams "Joe McGucken!!" when they need toilet paper. I could list many, many more....but I digress......

As I was saying....bad day at Black Rock here.....at least for Brody. The Sixers lost the game. He has been in a funk ever since. All that explaining above, just to say the Sixers lost! Not a big deal to most people....but it certainly is for #1 fan, Brody.

Mike painted in the bedroom all day....the trim is taking forever....2 coats on four windows, crown molding, two closets.....a lot of tedious work. Better Mike than me. He was so sick of being in the house that he insisted we go out to dinner. We went to our favorite local Italian restaurant. I had my favorite dish, Gnocchi Capri. Gnocchi in a cream, tomato, basil sauce, topped with mozzarella and baked. Artery clogging for sure, but it is soooooo delish!!

Time to get the kids to 'go up the golden stairs to sleep' (another family expression, origin unknown).

I love Saturday mornings. It is the only day of the week that I don't have to get up at the crack o' dawn. I LOVE to sleep in! I also like Saturday mornings because I don't have to jump in the shower the minute I crawl out of bed....I can lounge around in my sleep shirt and robe. I am an expert at being lazy!

TEN THINGS YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW ABOUT ME

1. I am left handed.

2. I am a sun whore and I have the dried out skin to prove it. I use lotion....but I only use Bain de Soleil #4 orange gelee.....which is about as effective as baby oil in protection. I lie in the sun almost every day in the summer. I also love to swim. I am the only old lady out there body surfing.

3. My mother was an older mother.....I have followed in her footsteps. She was 36 years old when she had me, very unusual for the 1950's.

4. I live 20 miles away from where I was born and raised.

5. I love to talk on the phone and thankfully have friends who like to do the same. It is not unusual for me to have hour long conversations or even 2 hour conversations. Mike just loves when I do that with my friends who live far away! LOL

6. I LOVE to drive. I find it a great stress-buster. When Marna was going through her colicky period I would often jump in the car right after I handed her over to Mike as he walked in the door. We live in a great area for driving.....long country roads leading to more long country roads.

7. I know the city of Philadelphia better than anyone I know, (except for my brother). I can get you to any part of the city, center city or otherwise. My friends are always calling me for directions to different parts of the city. Both sets of grandparents lived in Philadelphia and we spent many, many weekends there. My father was a great one for taking 'field trips', so my brother and I learned the city inside and out from checking out all the sites with our father.

8. I know a LOT of trivia. I know a little about almost everything and know a lot about nothing. My family has been telling me to go on Jeopardy for years. I just have a knack....well I used to have a knack, as I grow older I seem to be losing it a bit.....for remembering something I have read only once. All these useless little tidbits stuck in my brain. It came in very handy when I was in school.....I didn't have to study nearly as long as most people. We used to play trivia with friends on a regular basis, but they won't play with me any more.....we have moved on to card games! LOL

9. I suck at math. I hate math.

10. I lose my keys frequently. Mike has threatened to nail them to my ass on a chain.

I have just perused all the blogs that have become part of my daily net routine. I am amazed at how they are evolving. They all look so great.....fancy new colors, layouts, features, etc.

This thing ain't called BlogBore for nothing......this is the way this blog will remain.....boring in content and appearance! LOL

Didn't get to blog yesterday or do much of anything on the net for that matter. DSL was down. I called and got a recording that they were experiencing trouble in South Jersey (me), parts of Maryland and Pennsylvania. "We are working diligently to rectify the problem as quickly as possible." More than 12 hours later it finally connected.

Had an interesting afternoon yesterday. My friend Marge came over to give Marna her birthday presents. We were chatting away in the den and heard Brody and his friends playing their daily basketball game in the driveway. Brody came in and said, " Aunt Marge, some girl threw a skateboard and it hit your car and dented it." Brody has been known to kid around with stuff like this, so neither Marge nor I took him seriously at first. He realized we weren't buying it and finally said, "I am not kidding, come out and look."

We go out back and there are 3 middle school age girls standing there. I have never seen any of them before.
Sure enough, on the hood of Marge's Expedition are two huge dents from the wheels of the skateboard and a huge scrape from the grip tape on the deck of the board in between. Marge was much more calm than I would ever expect her to be and much more calm than I know I would have been had it been my car. I turned to the girls and asked which one threw it. The girl admitted it, I got her name and address, and then told her to leave as we do not tolerate behavior like that. It seems as though she was aiming for the head of one of Brody's friends and he ducked! I hate to think what would have happened to John had she made her target!!

As the girl is walking out of our yard, one of the other girls starts yelling at me, "Who the f*** do you think you are? You can't f***ing talk to my sister like that you motherf***er!" I can't even describe the rage I felt when that girl spewed those words in my direction. I did stay calm and said to her, "I'll tell you who I am. I am the owner of this property, the property you are trespassing upon and I suggest you leave this minute and if I ever see you or your sister here again, I will immediately call the police."
I expected another foul-mouthed response, but she mumbled under her breath and she and her friend walked to the street.

The boys came over and patted me on the back thrilled that I had 'handled' her. They said she is bad news and at the moment is suspended from school. It seems the girls were walking by and saw the boys in the backyard and decided to invite themselves back there. Of course my obvious question to the boys was why didn't you tell me or tell them to leave? Being adolescent boys, I think they enjoyed the idea of girls watching them play.....even though they don't like these girls.

We checked out Marge's car again and realized it was going to be a costly repair. We decided to call the police to get a report. The police came and said Marge had two choices.....go talk to the parents of the girl and try to work it out that way, or file charges against her and take it court to get the money. Marge decided she would talk to the parents first. I told the officer that she would only be doing that if he accompanied her. He said he would.

Marge came back and told us that another officer showed up. She went to the door of the house with an officer on either side of her. The mother was terribly upset at the throwing of the skateboard and the foul-mouthed back talk. Marge said the mother seemed distraught that her daughters are out of control. I found out from one of Brody's friends that the foul-mouthed sister broke a window of a neighbor .....with her fist!!!....and had the police called on her then, as well. Marge told her that she would like to keep the police out of it, if possible. The mother agreed and said I am going to have to pay for it either way so I would just like to keep it between us (she and Marge). Marge thinks the mother is sincere, but told the mother if it didn't work out this way, she would take it to court. The mother gave Marge her name and phone number and told Marge to call her when she got an estimate. I hope it does work out with no problems.

I am astounded at the behavior of these kids. What is up with kids these days?? I find it very scary that some kids think nothing of behaving in this manner.

Getting older sucks. Mike and I both went to bed fine. He woke up with a hurting back, I woke up with an aching hip. It really eats it when you get hurt in bed....SLEEPING!! Oh wait...maybe we had super wild sex in our sleep and neither of us remembers......shit, if we're so old we wouldn't remember that.....shoot us!!!

We went to pick out wallpaper for our bedroom today. I kind of dreaded it....I hate all those choices, and I had nothing in mind. I don't have a particular decorating style like country, traditional, etc.,.....if I like it, I use it. Our bedroom was last done when Brody was about a year old.....so 12 years later, it's ready for a re-do. Plus we have ordered new bedroom furniture. We have a mish mosh of furniture at the moment. Most of the set my parents bought me when I was a sophomore in high school and some pieces that a friend gave us when she moved.

We are keeping the butt-ugly 70's rust, brown, beige carpet. It is so ugly, but it's on the second floor, no one sees it and it is in excellent condition. Mike wanted to rip it up and have the hardwood floors.....I wanted the bedroom carpeted.....so since we are both too cheap to replace it, the butt-ugly carpet stays.

Back to the wallpaper....Mike, the supreme cheapo, went immediately to the overstock racks of wallpaper. I was perusing the books and finding NOTHING. He walked over to me with one that I nixed when he was about 3 feet away from me. He came over with a second one and I LOVED it. It's kind of indescribably wild....we both agreed it was the paper we would use. We only paper the wall where the head of the bed is.....the rest of the room will be coordinately painted. So, we will be busy re-doing the bedroom, once Mike removes the old wallpaper.

Marna and I baked "Amish Friendship Bread" this evening . It is a project she is doing with her Brownie troop. We got a bag of starter.....smelly fermenting stuff, much like sourdough starter......and have had it for 10 days. Most days we just had to squeeze the bag, but on the 5th day we had to add sugar, milk, and flour. We finished the recipe today..... adding lots of ingredients, making 4 more starter bags for other troop members and the rest we used for baking two loaves. We put raisins in one and chocolate chips in the other. They smelled surprisingly delicious as they were baking.....nothing like that stinky starter. When it was finished baking, we allowed it to cool sufficiently and we all tried a piece. Wow! Were we surprised......it is delicious!! Marna was quite proud that she practically made it all by herself!!

Tomorrow is the last day of spring break. Why they made it for them to go back on a Thursday, I don't know, but it will get us out that much earlier in June....so I'm not going to complain. We have no plans for the day as of yet.....but I don't think I want to stay home. I'll have to think of something to do tomorrow.

A very quiet day-after-Easter. Marna's birthday money was burning a hole in her pocket and she wanted to go shopping. Mike decided to take the kids and give me a day off......I can dig it! Marna bought a new DiscMan to replace her cheapo one. They also went to the CD store.....Marna bought a Faith Hill CD, Brody bought a Third Eye Blind CD and Mike bought a best of Loggins and Messina CD......what a variety of music!! They also stopped in at a dollar store on the way home and Brody brought me a candle and a bag of Mary Janes. I love those things! That kid knows me!

A lovely Easter day is winding down. Our guests just left and dear Michael is tackling the kitchen. We left all the mess so we could socialize with our friends Joan and Tony. Joan has to work tomorrow....has to get up at 5AM, so they couldn't stay too late, especially since they have an hour ride home.

I think this is the first Easter the kids have not awakened on their own. Does that mean they are getting old or does it mean they are getting too little sleep? We woke them up and they were both thrilled with their baskets. We went to church and boy, was it packed! I know it always is on Easter.....but I have never seen it so full. The choir was exceptionally terrific this morning and we had a guest flutist and pianist accompanying the organ. The music was incredible. Marna sang in the cherub choir and as I was watching her I couldn't believe she was standing there, facing all these people. She sang her little heart out. Marna used to be so terribly shy....at that time I would have never believed she would be able to sing in front of so many people. After the service, there was an egg hunt for the kids 12 and under.....the older kids filled and hid the plastic eggs all over the church yard.

We had friends from the shore for dinner. Tony is Mike's best friend and I really like Joan a lot. We drank a lot of wine, laughed a lot and enjoyed dinner. Mike is such a sweetie that he cleaned up everything. Not an easy job. We have a dishwasher, but none of the silver or old crystal stemware can go in.....he had to handwash a LOT. He is so good!!!! I am still miserably full from dinner. Think I will go get comfy......my nightshirt and robe are sounding pretty damned good at this moment.

I have been extremely busy doing day before Easter stuff. Dyed two dozen eggs....took us about 15 minutes....we warped through those things! I prepared as much dinner today as I possibly could. We are having friends for dinner and I don't like to be stuck in the kitchen any longer than I have to. I want to socialize and drink wine like everyone else! I am sitting here avoiding the ironing board. Marna's dress and Brody's shirt and pants have to be ironed. I HATE to iron pants. Mike will probably take pity on me and iron the pants for me if I bitch and moan enough! LOL After I get the ironing done, the Easter Bunny will arrive and I will probably hit the sack. I am tuckered out from Marna's sleepover. I am too old for this shit. They didn't go to sleep until 2:30 and woke up at 7:00. My eyelids are sinking slowing into the west.

I was looking through Marna's baby book this morning and found this. I'd forgotten I had written it.

Dear Marna,
Your first birthday! Can it be a year already since I saw the nurse check your "vitals" and proclaim, "It's a GIRL!"??

Daddy and I were thrilled! The nurse laid you on my stomach.... what a head of black hair you had! You opened your eyes and looked at me.....dark, brown eyes (and "they" say all babies are born with blue eyes). Your hair and eyes were so much darker than anyone in the family that Daddy and I used to say we wouldn't believe you were ours had we not been in the delivery room. We later found out that your coloring comes from Grandpop Russ' (my father and your middle name sake) side of the family.

You slept through the night right from the start. In fact the first couple of days, I thought there was something wrong with you, you slept so much. I didn't know how lucky I had it. At about 3 weeks, the colic set in. Boy, you could scream and scream and scream. Naps? Forget it! But luckily you still slept well at night.

You were so miserable with the colic that you weren't too happy an infant. Friends and family would turn themselves inside out trying to make you smile and laugh. Mostly, to no avail. The only person that seemed to make you happy consistently was your big brother, Brody. You have loved him from the moment you laid eyes on him.

You were so colicky we couldn't even take you to a restaurant without you screaming throughout our meal. Then around 5 1/2 months, when you began to sit up on your own and creep around on your tummy, your entire disposition changed. You turned into a smiling, laughing, big brown-eyed, wavy haired baby.

You are so much fun to be around! You are sometimes a little wreckless....you've broken 3 knick knacks at Grandmar's when her 3 grandsons have broken none! You love chasing Casper (Rooney is smart enough to hide from you!), saying your first word, "Cat, cat!". Brody's toys seem to be more fun to play with than your own and you delight in getting in his way when he tries to draw, build with Legos, etc. I think music is special to you. You dance and squeal when people sing or when you hear music from Brody's favorite TV shows, "Sesame Street" and "Barney".

I could probably write pages as to how much you have changed....a lot has happened in between your bawling infant stage and the present walking-explorer stage. But that's not my purpose in writing this.

I want you to know that Daddy and I are so happy that you are here. From the moment we discovered we were pregnant with you, through those colic months, until now....watching you begin to walk on your own...we have been thrilled to have you be a part of our family. I can't imagine the Coyne family without you.

We dream so much for you, Marna.....a world at peace, with no hunger, want or pollution. We dream of an educational system that will provide all students with an education that will prepare them for a productive life and the opportunity to obtain a college education regardless of their family income. We dream of a world without discrimination or prejudice. Mostly, we dream for you..... health, prosperity, and most importantly a life filled with love, respect and honesty.

Love......the most important part of a person's life. Love....that's what this letter is about.....how very much Daddy and I love you, no matter where you are or what you do.

Thank you so much for making us a complete family, Marna.

I will love you always and unconditionally,
Mommy

It's almost midnight and I don't hear any noise coming from Marna's room. Of course, I am downstairs and she and Kaitlyn are upstairs, but it does sound quiet. Could they be asleep??

Marna is so thrilled Kaitlyn is staying overnight. It was Marna's wish for a 'birthday party". They have done some summer clothes modeling for us and have done a dance to an N'Sync song. The low point of the evening was being forced to sit there and watch a Mary Kate and Ashley video....GAG!

Oooops! Spoke too soon....I just heard Marna's belly laugh! LOL